After months of anticipation, Ron had Deep Brain Stimulation surgery at Oregon Health and Sciences University Hospital.  The Surgery Part I was very successful.  Dr. Burchiel (the surgeon) said  it was downright boring.  The wires went in perfectly, with no bleeding.

We were blessed that our daughter Renee could come to stay with us for five days.  On the day of the surgery we arrived at 6:00 am at the hospital and then we were with Ron  in ICU from 1:30 to 7:30 pm. It was a LONG day (although Ron had a nice nap).  He  was released the next day. The hospital gives out souvenirs. Ron left sporting a wild hair-do– his head  was shaved half-way back to show off his 45 stitches.

It was amazing how short Surgery Part II was, nine days later.  That’s when they threaded wire down behind Ron’s ear and down his neck. That cord was then connected to the device under his collar bone which  sticks out, looking like a deck of cards. The surgeon gave me the Deep Brain Stimulator Patient Programmer.  Yes, I now have the remote that will give me complete power over my robot husband (pause for maniacal hysterical cackling).  As exciting as that may sound to all the wives out there, it’s not true.

Twenty days later, Ron’s neuro-stimulator was turned on and programmed. The doctor who did that job was Dr. Donovan, a little girl of 13.  Okay, perhaps 19, well possibly 35 . Why do medical personnel look so young?  She had a computer device in one hand and the stylus in the other and every time she touched the screen Ron would tell her what he was feeling (such as flashing lights in his eyes or twitching in his left calf).  Apparently every feeling was exactly what he was supposed to feel. The doctor said to Ron, “You’re a textbook case–no curve balls. I’m so excited!  When we left two hours later Ron’s speech was better–I can now understand him and his facial muscles are normal!  He walks better and  he doesn’t have the low “down” times he used to have several times a day.

That was the first “tune-up.”  We have just returned from the second.  The Neurologist gave me instruction so that I can now actually turn up the settings!  However, the Neurologist set limits so I can’t accidently blow Ron up.  When she was showing me how to use the device, I said, “Will it ever say, ‘this unit will self-destruct in 32 seconds?”  She said, “Yes, it will say ‘everyone leave the area immediately.'”  But Ron couldn’t leave the area since he would be the one exploding!  Now we know that even Neurologists have a sense of humor.

The stimulator in the brain will last the rest of Ron’s life, the doctors say.  He’ll just need the battery inside the implanted device replaced.  It will be a bit different than replacing a flashlight battery, since it requires surgery to open up the “slot” in the skin and take the device out.  [Eeeeuuuu, that will be quite a messy battery change!]

Speaking of brains, one of Ron’s twisted malapropisms makes this statement about an intelligent man, “he really has a brain on his shoulders.”