I can’t believe I haven’t written a blog for approximately 83 years!  Okay, apparently it’s only been six months.  It seems my life has been a haze of stress.  My most recent stress has been preparing to move from our home of 24 years.  I’ve been sorting, giving away, selling or throwing away stuff (I must do more of that) which we have been collecting for 47 years.  Why do we embrace all this junk?

Yes, the time has come to sell our home.  I bravely wrote a friend:  “we’re not selling our home, we’re selling our house.  Our home consists of Ron and I and we are just relocating.”  Sounds great, but it’s still difficult to say good-bye to a house full of memories of kids, grandkids and other assorted relatives and friends filling the house with laughter and love.

Packing is indeed stressful, but what is even worse is Keeping the House Clean.  We have a two hour warning that our house will be shown to prospective buyers.  Even though it is a simple phone call from our lovely realtor, it might as well be an ambulance siren as I dash all over (while Ron slowly walks) to pick up, put away and hide the items that will give away our secret.

Ron and I have a secret:  we’re slobs.  But all through the showings of the house we must continue the charade of convincing people we are live in a perfectly neat, organized and efficient environment.  [Look, Ron is in the middle of my environment!]  At first, I erroneously referred to people seeing our home as a “viewing.”  But then I realized that a viewing usually refers to visiting a funeral home and viewing a loved-one’s remains.  We do not live in a dead house!  Therefore, we have showings of our house, not viewings.

As I was driving into town (that drive is one of the reasons we’re moving) I was thinking of a recent incident where I realized I had a very good attitude.  I remarked to myself, “self, you did pretty good with your response that time!”  Then I realized Pride had just insinuated itself into the picture again.  I immediately rebuked pride in my life and thanked Jesus that whenever I do something good, He gets all the glory.  I have learned during my many years as a child of God that if I don’t recognize that ugly pride in an area of my life and deal with it, God is very faithful to humble me.  In fact, He’s downright creative!

It suddenly occurred to me that I have a split personality.  [In fact, all Christians have a split personality.]  When I do something good, that’s Jesus at work.  When I do something bad or uncaring or outrageous or just plain stupid, that’s me at work.

Back to the selling of our house—the other reason this must be done is because we have two stories which are logically joined together by a set of stairs.  This has been a problem as Ron’s Parkinson’s has progressed.  One of the advantages of a staircase in a log house is that there are railings on each side.  Ron has always been very careful to hold onto both railings as he slowly makes his trips up or down.

Alas, Ron has been falling frequently (never on the stairs, praise God).  His cane hasn’t prevented any of the falls, so it has been recommended by several medical professionals that Ron should get a walker (one designed for Parkinson’s patients).  It is perfectly understandable that Ron is balking at this suggestion.  He’s only 68 years old and if he uses a walker he’ll feel like an old man.  Then there’s my Dad.  When he was 93 he was stumbling along with two canes.  He didn’t want to use the recommended walker because he didn’t want to look like an old man.  He WAS an old man!  When he finally did start using the walker he was amazed at the freedom of movement he had.  Ron has accepted the fact that a walker is looming in his immediate future.

The other day I heard the phrase “we’re perfect for each other.”  This phrase is most often uttered by a young couple who have recently fallen in love.  Ron and I have been married 47 years and I can’t say “we’re perfect for each other,” but I CAN say, “we’re imperfect for each other.”  Yes, we’re two imperfect people who have found a deep committed love that will continue to last as long as we do.

Speaking of Ron accepting the idea of a walker, this malapropism of his fits:  “It’ll be a hard nut to swallow.”  (Hint: Hard to swallow. Tough nut to crack.)

*Hyponea – noun.  Dulled mental activity.  (What we have when we’re packing.  What you have when you’re reading this blog.)  See page 288 of The Official Scrabble Players Dictionary.